9 Innocent Phrases That Quietly Undermine You

You’re not “just” asking a question.

You’re not “probably overthinking it.”

And you’re definitely not asking a “dumb” question.

But every time you use phrases like that, you chip away at your authority.

Here are 9 phrases that quietly undermine you – and what to say instead:

1./ “Just wanted to…”
Softens your message into nothing.
➡️ Try: “Reaching out because…” or “Following up to…”

2./ “Hope that’s okay!”
Permission-seeking doesn’t sound confident.
➡️ Try: “Let me know if that doesn’t work for you.”

3./ “If you have a minute…”
Minimizes your ask before you even make it.
➡️ Try: “Got a quick question about [specific thing].”

4./ “I’m probably overthinking this, but…”
Nope. You’re just killing your credibility.
➡️ Try: “Something that stood out — curious what you think.”

5./ “This might be a dumb question, but…”
Now it sounds dumb even if it’s not.
➡️ Try: “Quick question — might be obvious, but I want to be sure.”

6./“I’m not sure I explained that well…”
That’s doubt disguised as humility.
➡️ Try: “Let me reframe that more clearly.”

7./ “Does that make sense?”
Can sound patronizing or unsure.
➡️ Try: “What’s your take on that?”

8./ “I’ll let you decide!”
You’re abdicating leadership.
➡️ Try: “Here’s what I recommend – open to your thoughts.”

9./ “No worries if not!”
Looks polite. Sounds like a cop-out.
➡️ Try: “If it’s not the right fit, all good – just let me know.”

These swaps are subtle. But the shift in perception? Massive.

You’ll sound more clear. More confident. More in control.

Say less. Say it sharper.