It’s ok to give up on your dreams

The title of this article may seem contrary to the quote. However I am sure that as you keep reading through, you will agree with me!

We all have dreams that come in all shapes and sizes. At a young age we start dreaming of what we will be when we grow up, whether it’s spoken aloud or kept a secret from the world. And many a time these dreams change based on all that we keep learning at school. I remember wanting to become a pilot, then a programmer when I started playing with computers.

How many of us are living out what we dreamed of becoming when we were small?

We are constantly bombarded with messages like “Never give up on your dreams”, “Refuse to give up”, “Follow your passion”. A few days back I had shared my thoughts on never giving up

As I see it, childhood dreams, long term goals or short term goals, should keep us happy, propel us forward and not tie us down and make us feel awful.

Sometimes part of life is choosing to let go of some dreams and to create or embrace other ones.

As much as we are the creators of our lives, life also teaches us. We change and life brings us new opportunities, and sometimes they are better than the ones we thought we wanted.

Paulette Sherman

Certain dreams may be coming in the way of even bigger and better ones! We think that holding on to our dreams, sticking to our guns, makes us strong. I feel it takes more courage and strength to realise and accept that it is time to let go and move on. You will know when the time has come to stop pursuing what you thought was your dream. There is nothing wrong with saying this isn’t meant for me.

You got to know when to hold ’em…know when to fold ’em.

Kenny Rogers

For those of you who may not know me well, I was with the Jesuits for 8 years, fulfilling my dream of being ordained a priest. After a long struggle, I finally decided that this wasn’t meant to be. I was shattered and heartbroken. It took me a while to decide to leave, move on and start rebuilding my life. Today when I look back, it’s amazing to see how those 8 years made such a huge difference to who I am today and I will be eternally grateful to the Jesuits for the guidance during those formative years.

What really helped me take such a big decision was Ignatian Discernment. A summary of this is below with a nice video as well

• We need to look at the decision prayerfully from all angles.
• We need to take time with the decision, be patient, trust the process, and ultimately trust that God will lead us to the right place if we do our part as best we can.
• In the end, we must follow what our heart and gut tell us to do and what seems right to us. In life decisions and matters of the heart we rarely feel complete certainty and clarity. This is more than a rational process. However, once we’ve considered the decision prayerfully, consulted others we trust, and have attained all the data we reasonably can, we need to take a leap of faith and make a decision.

We are all meant to fly, it just takes time to earn our wings