We live in a world that constantly tells us what we should be happy about—a promotion, a new relationship, a shiny possession, or even the perfect Instagrammable moment. But what happens when those things slip away? What happens when the job is lost, the relationship ends, or the shiny new car gets a scratch? C.S. Lewis, the brilliant author and philosopher, once offered a timeless piece of wisdom: “Do not let your happiness depend on something you may lose.” These words are a wake-up call, a reminder to anchor our joy in something deeper, something unshakable.
The Fragility of External Happiness
It’s human nature to seek happiness in external things. We tie our emotions to outcomes, people, and possessions because they give us a quick hit of dopamine. But here’s the catch: everything external is temporary. Jobs change, relationships evolve, and material possessions wear out. When we base our happiness on these fleeting things, we set ourselves up for a rollercoaster of emotions—elation one moment, despair the next.
Lewis’s quote challenges us to rethink this approach. If our happiness is tied to something we can lose, then we’re essentially handing over control of our emotional well-being to the unpredictable whims of life. And let’s be honest, life doesn’t always play fair.
The Power of Inner Joy
So, if we shouldn’t depend on external things for happiness, where should we look? The answer lies within. Inner joy—the kind that doesn’t waver with circumstances—comes from a deeper place. It’s rooted in our values, our sense of purpose, and our ability to find meaning even in the midst of challenges.
Think of it like this: external happiness is like building a house on sand. It might look sturdy for a while, but when the storms come, it won’t hold up. Inner joy, on the other hand, is like building a house on solid rock. It’s unshakable, no matter what life throws at us.
How to Cultivate Inner Joy
- Practice Gratitude for the Present Moment
Instead of chasing the next big thing, take a moment to appreciate what you already have. Gratitude shifts your focus from what’s missing to what’s abundant in your life. It’s a simple but powerful way to find joy in the here and now. - Invest in Relationships, Not Outcomes
While relationships can bring us happiness, it’s important to love people for who they are, not for what they can do for us. True connection is about presence, not possession. - Find Meaning in the Journey
Life isn’t about reaching a destination; it’s about the journey. When we focus on growth, learning, and the process rather than the end result, we free ourselves from the pressure of needing everything to go perfectly. - Embrace Impermanence
Everything in life is temporary—both the good and the bad. When we accept this truth, we can enjoy the good moments without clinging to them and navigate the tough moments without being crushed by them. - Connect with Something Greater
For some, this might mean spirituality or faith. For others, it could be a connection to nature, art, or a cause bigger than themselves. When we align with something greater, we tap into a source of joy that transcends our individual circumstances.
Why This Matters Now More Than Ever
In today’s fast-paced, hyper-connected world, it’s easy to fall into the trap of chasing external validation. Social media, consumer culture, and societal pressures constantly tell us that happiness is just one purchase, one achievement, or one milestone away. But Lewis’s wisdom reminds us that this is a mirage. True happiness isn’t something we can buy, earn, or borrow—it’s something we cultivate within ourselves.
The Freedom of Letting Go
C.S. Lewis’s quote isn’t just about happiness; it’s about freedom. When we stop tying our joy to things we might lose, we free ourselves from the fear of loss. We learn to live more fully, more authentically, and more courageously. We discover that happiness isn’t something we need to chase—it’s something we can choose, moment by moment, no matter what life brings.
So, the next time you find yourself depending on something external for your happiness, pause and ask yourself: Is this something I could lose? If the answer is yes, take a deep breath and remind yourself that your joy doesn’t have to hang by a thread. It can be as steady and unshakable as you choose to make it.
After all, as Lewis so wisely pointed out, the best kind of happiness is the kind that no one—and nothing—can take away from you.
Kenrick Vaz 