We live in a world obsessed with reading people.
Body language hacks. Microexpression analysis. Countless articles on “how to know what someone is really thinking.”
But here’s a wild idea: What if the person you most need to understand… is you?
“Read yourself, not people.”
That quote hit me like a splash of cold water — simple, but piercing. Because let’s be honest: It’s way easier to analyze others than to face what’s going on inside our own minds.
The Illusion of Control
Trying to read others gives us the illusion of control.
“If I can predict their reaction, I’ll know what to say.”
“If I can read their mood, I can protect myself.”
But people are unpredictable. Their emotions shift. Their intentions aren’t always visible. And even when you think you’ve got someone figured out… you probably don’t.
On the flip side, reading yourself? That’s a superpower.
When you understand your own triggers, biases, fears, and patterns — you stop living on autopilot. You show up with more clarity. You react less and respond more. You live with intention, not assumption.
Questions > Assumptions
Instead of asking:
“Why did they say that?”
“What are they thinking?”
“Are they judging me?”
Ask yourself:
“Why did that comment bother me?”
“What am I feeling right now?”
“Where is this insecurity coming from?”
That inner awareness? It rewires how you show up in relationships, work, and life.
The Real Flex: Emotional Literacy
Forget mind reading. Emotional literacy — the ability to read your own thoughts and feelings with honesty — is where growth lives.
That’s where confidence builds. That’s where you stop needing approval, because you already know who you are and what matters to you.
So yeah, read the room. But read yourself first.
Because when you know your own story, you don’t get lost in someone else’s.
“The deepest journey you’ll ever take is the one inward.”
So the next time you find yourself trying to decode someone else, pause.
Ask yourself: What’s going on inside me right now?
You might be surprised how many answers you already hold.
What’s one thing you’ve learned about yourself lately that changed the way you see the world?
Drop it in the comments — let’s learn from each other’s reflections.
Kenrick Vaz 