When Things Don’t Go As Planned…

It is one of the hard things in life: accepting that life sometimes doesn’t go as planned. We manage to come up with the most beautiful things in our mind. We go along with timeless new encounters which seem to be developing into lifelong friendships, or hope that this new encounter might lead to the eternal fairytale marriage.

From a young age we dream of a carefree and stable future, of a road which we map according to a specific plan. But when the most beautiful things and plans suddenly come to an end, when the beauty disappears in seconds and life takes you in a different direction than planned, there is simply nothing you can do but accept the disappointment.

I believe a valid reason hides behind everything that happens. Every disappointment is a snapshot which prevents you from making a wrong choice, or even a worse choice. And it is something which will occasionally challenge you to become a better version of yourself. Sometimes the time simply hasn’t come for certain things to happen, how amazing they might be. This can only be agreed upon when you give the event some time, by giving yourself some time to deal with a disappointment. Later on you will see that life always goes the way it should.

At some point in our lives we all experienced that we weren’t selected for a job or an internship, but subsequently were rewarded with something better. Or perhaps we got rejected in love, but after an endless amount of waiting, suddenly our dream partner was standing right in front of our noses.

For every event the same holds true: you just have to see the good in it. And, above all: have faith. Turn your fears into power, action and patience. In time everything will be all right, because life is filled with unprecedented surprises. Even for you.

Learning when to let something go can be a challenge for those of us who feel pressured to “get it right the first time,” no matter what the setting. Here are some things that help me to let go and move on:

  1. Learn to concede a loss, Accept it
  2. Turn Anger/Resentment/Jealousy Into a Motivating Force
  3. Forgive Yourself If It’s Too Late for You to Be Forgiven
  4. Let Past Mistakes Be Bridges to Better Choices Now
  5. Turn the Chance That Slipped Through Your Fingers Into a Grasp on the Future

Some people have no trouble letting go of things that keep others up at night or obsessing about what “could have been.” Truly, there is no one alive who will not make some mistake or let something slip through their fingers that they will wish they had held onto. Life is full of opportunities and regrets. However, when regret becomes an obsession and you lose sight of what is in your present due to what you did in your past, this becomes the biggest obstacle to a fulfilling future.

Give yourself a pass, forgive yourself and others for being human, and learn from the lessons of earlier experiences. You will become much more likely to create a present that leaves less opportunity for future rounds of the “what ifs” and “why didn’t I’s” that keep us from being satisfied in the moment.

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