They said, “Hurt people hurt people.” And for a long time, I believed that. It sounded true. Pain does have a way of spilling over, touching everything it shouldn’t. It hardens hearts, builds walls, and makes us cautious, even cold. But somewhere along the way, I realized there’s another side to that story—one we don’t talk about enough.
Not all hurt people hurt people.
Some take their pain and turn it into purpose. They become the gentle souls who listen without judgment, who show up quietly when others need them, who build bridges where there used to be walls. They’re the ones who know what it’s like to break, so they go out of their way to help others hold it together.
Some hurt people break cycles. They stop the generational patterns that kept pain alive and breathing. They choose healing over repeating. They parent differently, love differently, speak differently. They turn “never again” into a way of life.
Some hurt people build safe spaces. They make others feel seen, valued, and understood because they remember what it was like to feel invisible. Their kindness isn’t accidental—it’s intentional, born from what they once lacked.
And some hurt people heal people. They find purpose in helping others rise, even when they’re still learning how to stand tall themselves. Their empathy becomes medicine. Their scars become stories that remind others they can survive too.
So no, hurt people don’t just hurt people. Sometimes, they become the very reason someone else learns that healing is possible.
Maybe that’s the quiet miracle of pain—it doesn’t have to end where it began. Some wounds close, but some transform into hands that heal. And maybe that’s how the world slowly becomes better—one healed heart helping another.
Kenrick Vaz 