Kenrick Vaz

The Impeccable One

Tiana Alicia Rodrigues

You were ahead of your time,
In your humble way,
You accepted God’s will,
Over your own fears.

Did you think of society?
Were you worried what if?
Did it hurt to let go?
Your journey has me in awe.

A woman of substance,
A lady with a heart of courage,
A mother with unconditional love,
A model to every generation.

In you, I see hope for every girl,
The ones who fight silent battles,
Those unborn and struggling to feel loved,
The fun loving, vivacious entrepreneurs,
The beautiful homemakers,
Those working hard to make ends meet,
Those who like you build lives through their own.
Those judged for their lives and choices
but not by their scars,
Those who pick themselves daily
even when the world tears them apart.

An epitome of strength to each one,
Our fortress of protection,
An inspiration to every girl,
Make us more like you,
While we strive to thrive.
Happy birthday! Happy Feast!

The Warrior’s Destiny

A great Japanese warrior named Nobunaga was going to war with a fierce enemy with only one-tenth the number of men the opposition commanded. He knew that he could win the fight with a well planned strategy, but his soldiers were in doubt.

On the way the leader stopped at a Shinto shrine and told his men: “After my visit to the shrine I will toss a coin. If the head comes, we will win; if tails, we will lose. Destiny holds us in her hand.”

Nobunaga entered the shrine and offered his prayers. Then he came forth and tossed a coin in front of his men. Heads appeared. The soldiers were filled with confident and were eager to win the battle.

“No one can change the hand of destiny,” one of his attendants told him after the battle.

“Indeed not,” said Nobunaga and showed the coin which was doubled with heads on the both side.

Silence

There are some days when we just would love to sit in silence and enjoy some peace and quiet. There is absolutely nothing wrong with that. We don’t need to be always talking. And this is the same even if you are married or you are single. There are situations where we have no words and times when silence is the most appropriate thing to say.

Silence is as much a part of communication as rests are a part of music. Without the rests, without the silence, there is no pause, there is no reflection. Just noise.

There are times when word won’t say what you feel, and silence is the appropriate alternative. There are times when words are simply taking up space and not providing anything useful, and silence is simply the best possible alternative.

There are times when simply being is sufficient, and words would be inappropriate, and silence is appropriate. There are times when words would take away from the focus or effort at hand, and silence is the appropriate alternative. There are plenty of other times when silence is useful or appropriate.

Yet there are people who seem oblivious to the need or appropriateness of silence, and keep on talking. Some may not know any better, others may be in love with the sound of their own voice, and a few are actually afraid of the silence. Without the basic knowledge of silence, how can they truly understand what you say?

Words and silence go hand in hand. Thus we have such terms as ‘Dramatic Pause’ and a ‘Pregnant Silence’ and so many more. Timing in comedy is all about manipulating silence and integrating it into the routine. The space between paragraphs is another form of silence.

Silence is as much a part of life and conversation as are the words. Spend as much time contemplating the value of silence as you do contemplating the value of what is said. For sometimes what is not said is just as important.

I Speak Silence ~ Sarah Ismail

There is so much I want to say
But I can not, there is no way
I speak silence.

I want to tell him to take the bus
I want to tell her to spend more time with us
But I speak silence.

I want to tell her not to feel bad
I want to tell him he is the best dad
But I speak silence.

I want to ask him to play his drums
I want to tell him to do his sums
But I speak silence.

I want to ask her when it ends
I want to tell them they are my friends
But I speak silence.

I want to tell her to make it blue
I want to tell him I love him true
But I speak silence.

I want to tell him it is just a waste of time
I want to tell her to fix this crime
But I speak silence.

I want to play the game
I want to know her name
But I speak silence.

I want to know how winning feels
How I would love to move without these wheels
But I speak silence… no one understands.

There is so much I have to say
But I can not, there is no way
I speak silence.

Your Inner Voice

Whether we’re willing to admit it or not, everyone has an inner voice that guides them in their day to day lives. Most of us can easily recall a situation in which an inner voice, perhaps considered a conscience or merely a fleeting thought, gave us sound advice that we knew was the right option. Time and time again, gridlocked decision-making processes have only been concluded after someone listened to their gut. Isn’t it time we start listening to our inner voice more?

We’re all similar in one way; no matter how tough we act or what wrongs we commit, we all always have a nagging inner voice at the back of our head that appears whenever we’re facing a moral dilemma. From early childhood to the end of our lives, we encounter situations of moral turpitude where we’re forced to make a decision for the good or bad of ourselves or someone else. During times like these, it can be easy to try and tune out your inner voice and make what you believe to be a purely rational decision arrived at through thinking, but as a matter of fact listening to your inner voice is imperative to making the right choice in your daily life.

Amidst all clamour
stay calm, stay quiet.
Only then will you hear
your inner voice.

Let your heart lead
and your mind follow
the dictates of
your inner voice.

Your inner voice –
the captain of your ship
and your guiding light
that shields you from all evil thoughts.

Whenever in a dilemma,
seek advice and heed to suggestions.
But never ever ignore
your own inner voice.

Your inner voice –
your greatest strength
Even when the whole world turns against you
It remains your best friend.

Gita Ashok

The Teacher’s Hand

Thanksgiving Day was near. The first grade teacher gave her class a fun assignment — to draw a picture of something for which they were thankful.

Most of the class might be considered economically disadvantaged, but still many would celebrate the holiday with turkey and other traditional goodies of the season. These, the teacher thought, would be the subjects of most of her student’s art. And they were.

But Douglas made a different kind of picture. Douglas was a different kind of boy. He was the teacher’s true child of misery, frail and unhappy. As other children played at recess, Douglas was likely to stand close by her side. One could only guess at the pain Douglas felt behind those sad eyes.

Yes, his picture was different. When asked to draw a picture of something for which he was thankful, he drew a hand. Nothing else. Just an empty hand.

His abstract image captured the imagination of his peers. Whose hand could it be One child guessed it was the hand of a farmer, because farmers raise turkeys. Another suggested a police officer, because the police protect and care for people. Still others guessed it was the hand of God, for God feeds us. And so the discussion went — until the teacher almost forgot the young artist himself.

When the children had gone on to other assignments, she paused at Douglas’ desk, bent down, and asked him whose hand it was.

The little boy looked away and muttered, It’s yours, teacher.

She recalled the times she had taken his hand and walked with him here or there, as she had the other students. How often had she said, Take my hand, Douglas, we’ll go outside. Or, Let me show you how to hold your pencil. Or, Let’s do this together. Douglas was most thankful for his teacher’s hand.

Brushing aside a tear, she went on with her work.

This story speaks of more than thankfulness. It says something about teachers teaching and parents parenting and friends showing friendship, and how much it means to the Douglases of the world. They might not always say thanks. But they’ll remember the hand that reaches out.

The Crab Mentality

There once was a man who sat on a fishing dock and observed how a bunch of live crabs, in a bucket, behaved.

While all of them squirmed at the bottom, every now and then, one crab would crawl up the side in an effort to reach the top and escape. But each time it made its way closer to the rim, a crab from below would reach up and pull it back down. Then, another crab would climb upward, and again, one crab from the bottom would tug it back down.

A crab placed alone in a bucket will easily climb out and escape, but when you place it with a few of its mates, this interesting phenomenon occurs: One at a time, as the crabs try to escape, other crabs will pull them back down to their misery and the group’s collective demise.

In psychology, this behavior became known as “The Crab Effect,” or “The Crab Mentality,” as a way to illustrate the selfish, harmful, and jealous mindset of some members in a group, who will try to undermine and halt the progress of the other better-performing members in the group.

The Crab Mentality thrives on the fixed mindset that was described above, but this mindset is also an extension of what Stephen Covey described in his book, The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People, as the scarcity mindset: “People with a scarcity mentality tend to see everything in terms of win-lose. There is only so much; and if someone else has it, that means there will be less for me.”

It’s a mindset we cultivate from our environment and one that is built on the assumption that if someone else becomes successful, this would somehow mean that we can no longer reach higher levels of success anymore.

And this kind of thinking will suck the joy out of your life: You’ll perceive your peers as competitors rather than people you can collaborate with and learn from. You’ll work from a place of fear, emptiness, and insecurity rather than a place of self-worth and confidence. You’ll narrow-down your vision and so you’ll only see the one small piece of the pie, not the entirety of it.

So, here’s how you can build and maintain a mindset of growth and abundance:

Push, don’t pull. You don’t need to be the crab pulling others down. Instead, you can be the one who lifts them up. Learn to give and be in service to other people.

The best way to find yourself is to lose yourself in the service of others.
Mahatma Gandhi

Consciously practice gratitude. Gratitude is the secret to an abundance mindset, and the daily practice of it trains your mind to see all the good that is already there.

Stop comparing. Only compare yourself to your previous self. Sure, it’s easier said than done.

Drop “I’m jealous” from your daily use. Jealousy will ruin you. It breeds unjust feelings of hate and resentment. When someone works hard for something, and they share their news of triumph with you, reply with “I’m proud of you,” or “I’m happy for you,” or “I admire what you’re doing.” These words will elicit more joyful emotions in you than “I’m jealous.”

Don’t judge others, see their light as inspiration instead. You can paint somebody’s success in a negative light. You can point out flaws in their achievements. You can say they don’t deserve it, complain that it’s unfair, succumb to the pitiful victim role, and judge this person for all the luck they’ve enjoyed along the way. Or you can be compassionate. You can recognize the vulnerable effort that a person endured. You can view him or her as a source of light and inspiration that sparks the fire in you. It all lies in your perspective.

You don’t have to be the victim of your environment. You can also be the architect of it… If you want to maximize your odds of success, then you need to operate in an environment that accelerates your results rather than hinders them.
James Clear

Form a new tribe. One that inspires you. That supports you. That helps you fully step into your own world so you can lean into what calls you—what you know is right for you—and swim in the deep end of the sea, away from the shallow end, where everyone else swims.

Find someone who will water your strengths.
Find someone who will dim the voice of your inner critic so you can raise that of your confident-self.
Find someone who will lift you up, not claw you down.

Ultimately, no one can keep you in a confined box except you. Yes, it’s difficult to succeed when people are constantly trying to pull you down, but it’s not impossible. It can be done, and it has.

We can all strive to be a dreamer, a visionary, someone seeking something better for yourself, then start the crawl upward, because before you know it, the constant effort, struggle, and sacrifice will forge the wings upon which you will soar, and fly.

And once you climb out of that bucket, the open sea is yours to discover.

Do what you say you’re going to do

It’s easy for us to lose focus when we have so much going on all around us. We set lofty goals, new resolutions and start well. And then we lose track of what we set out to achieve. But more importantly I think it’s important to do what you say you will do even with the daily tasks at work or at home. Do you mean what you say? Do you say you will do something and then not do it?

I’m sure we all experience this often. Someone says they will call and they don’t. Someone says they will follow through on a project and they don’t. Someone says they will get something important finished by a particular time and they don’t. How do you feel about someone who says they will do something and they don’t do it?

Here are 3 reasons to do what you say you’re going to do.

Integrity
For me, doing what I say I will do is a matter of integrity. I wouldn’t feel good about myself if I didn’t keep my word. My word means something to me — I do not take it lightly. If your keeping your word doesn’t mean much to you, why is that?
Trust & Reliability
If someone lets you down a number of times, then you know they are not reliable. I find that this limits my desire to spend time with them, which is sometimes sad, but I have learned to accept that I cannot trust them to follow through on what they say they are going to do. Friendships and deeply connected relationships thrive on trust.
Self-worth
We cannot feel worthy when we let ourselves down by letting others down. People who renege on their word do not value themselves enough to act with integrity. Are you kidding yourself that you can feel inwardly worthy when you don’t keep your commitments? Self-worth is the result of treating ourselves and others with caring and respect.

We are all human. We make mistakes. We forget. We fail. The point here is to not make this a habit. If you’re known as someone who doesn’t meet promises and expectations, you will face consequences. Strive to be someone of your word. Especially when it’s a “small thing,” make sure you do it. After all, if you fail at the “little stuff,” no one will trust you with the “big stuff.”

When to be Silent, When to Speak Up

The popular saying “speech is silver but silence is golden” dates back to ancient Egypt. It probably means that in some circumstances the less you say the better it is. I can imagine that when you are in the company of strangers, discretion would be more appropriate than indiscretion.

Remaining silent also can represent a risk. In today’s world of overwhelming chatter and information overload, “silence is the most toxic strategy” to reputation and integrity. If we remain silent, someone else will fill the void with more made-up chatter and misinformation.

A lot of us also often tend to sit on the fence. To sit on the fence means you choose not to pick a side in an argument or fail to make a decision on a subject.

To me sitting on the fence is not a good character trait because I think it is important to clearly state what you believe in regardless of whether it fits with the popular consensus or not. Your words and action are what people identify you with so if you are known to sit on the fence it would be difficult to assess your mindset.

Although I believe you shouldn’t sit on the fence, I understand that there are some situations which you may not be able to give a clear-cut answer due to the complexities of the scenario.

How then should we determine when is the time to remain silent and when is the time to speak? Each situation becomes a judgment call. I ask myself:

Will my voice make a difference?
Does engaging this time mean I will be more, or less effective the next time?
How will I see myself in 20 years if I don’t speak up?”

I believe we should consider the well-being of those who will be impacted by our decision not to speak up.

As I see it, two of the fundamental values are fairness and loyalty. By remaining silent when faced with injustice, we are neither fair to others nor loyal to ourselves and our values.

As William Faulkner once said, “Never be afraid to raise your voice for honesty and truth and compassion against injustice and lying and greed. If people all over the world … would do this, it would change the earth.”

Embracing Minimalism

More people than ever are becoming curious about minimalism. Also known as simple living, or minimalist living, minimalism isn’t just about eliminating physical objects from your life; at its core, it’s about removing anything that isn’t adding value to your life. In doing this, you create more space for the things that will.

A beautiful concept in theory, but how does one go about establishing a minimalist lifestyle?

One of the key starting points is to identify why you want a simpler life. Chances are that something specific is spurring you to seek out minimalism. Whether you’d like to focus more on self-care, to travel more, to reassess your career or to simply cultivate more “me time,” knowing your motivations will help to guide you on your new adventure.

Simplicity, clarity, singleness: These are the attributes that give our lives power and vividness and joy as they are also the marks of great art.
Richard Holloway

Modern culture has bought into the lie that the good life is found in accumulating things—in possessing as much as possible. They believe that more is better and have inadvertently subscribed to the idea that happiness can be purchased at a department store.

But they are wrong. Embracing minimalism brings freedom from the all-consuming passion to possess. It steps off the treadmill of consumerism and dares to seek happiness elsewhere. It values relationships, experiences, and soul-care. It lets us see all that we already have and reminds us to be grateful.

Embracing minimalistic living will change your life for the better, giving you much needed time and space to pursue things that actually matter.

Being Wise, Being Smart

The difference between being smart and being wise might just sound like a question of semantics, but really there’s much more to it than that! Smart people focus absorbing as much knowledge as possible and showing the world that they’re cleverer than average, whereas wise people also find knowledge within and aren’t so focussed on showing it off. Of course, a smart person can become a wise person if they’re willing to make a few changes and put in some effort. I came across these eight graphics on Lifehack which show the major differences between being wise and being smart. Take a look and see for yourself!

The ideal plan is to work on being wise and smart. Allow your thinking to be challenged in order to get sharper. Apply what you learn in order to turn your knowledge into wisdom. If you know but do not do, you’re considered someone smart. If you learn and apply that knowledge, even though you may make mistakes, you’re working toward becoming wise. And by doing so, you will notice a difference in the way you handle people, overcome challenges, resolve issues, manage money, and increase your value in your occupation.