Finding your Passion

It can be so frustrating when people advise you, “Just follow your passion!” Yeah, sure, you’d love to—if only you knew what your passion was.

Remember when we were kids? We would just do things, not sitting to weigh the pros and cons. Did we think to ourselves “What are the benefits of playing basketball versus football versus cricket?” We just ran onto the playground and played! We built sandcastles on the beach, played hide and seek with friends, asked silly questions, played pranks on our cousins, looked for bugs and insects, opened up broken radios or broke the ones that were working!

Nobody told us to do it, we just did it. We were led merely by our curiosity and excitement.

And the beautiful thing was, if you hated cricket, you just stopped playing it. There was no guilt involved. There was no arguing or debate. You either liked it or you didn’t.

And if you loved looking for bugs, you just did that. There was no second-level analysis of, “Well, is looking for bugs really what I should be doing with my time as a child? Nobody else wants to look for bugs, does that mean there’s something wrong with me? How will looking for bugs affect my future prospects?”

If you liked something you just did it!

We’re now so habituated to use our minds to analyze, rationalize and figure things out. It’s natural yet so very torturous!

Here’s the problem: Passion can’t be found in your head because it lives in your heart!

And the flames of passion are fanned by engagement, not thought. Right?

No matter how hard you try, you cannot figure out your passion by thinking about it. You need to take action and feel your way to your truth, from the inside out.

For example, for years, I have been wanting to actually learn ballroom dancing.

But most of my thoughts sounded like this: “Wow…dancing would be awesome, but you’re too old to get started. Most start training or enroll when they’re in their teens. You’ve had zero professional training, and you’re already in your 30s. Get real.”

Or, “It sounds exciting, but dance is a waste of time, it is crazy and irresponsible. And a waste of money”

The endless and debilitating chatter in our minds often tries to talk us out of what our hearts are yearning to explore.

I still have to make it for my first dance class and I am going to ensure it happens this year!

I had the same thoughts about having a blog and putting my thoughts for the world to read. No matter how much I wondered about it before, it wasn’t until I physically took action that my real passion (and gift) fully emerged. Magic really does start to happen when you follow your heart. 

Embrace this key idea and it will change your life: Clarity comes from engagement, not thought.

But taking action on something you suspect to be your passion is just part of the story. There’s another important (and rarely discussed) piece to the passion puzzle.

Proactively bring passion to everything you touch, to everything you do. No matter what task is in front of you, bring as much enthusiasm and energy to it as you possibly can. Bring your full attention, your full presence, the Godlike quality that each of us has within, to every task in your day.

Passion is contagious. When you’re fully present and passionately engaged with your life, people around you take notice and want in on whatever you’re doing. 

Another side benefit to proactive passion is kicking life-sucking habits like procrastination, resistance and complaining straight to the curb. 

So here are 4 simple steps to find your passion

1. Love everything you do.

In any given moment, if you can’t change what you’re doing, you can always change how you’re doing it.

2. Look at your book collection, magazines and credit card statements. Notice any themes?

What subjects are you constantly gravitating toward? What are you already spending your time, money and energy on? Your heart and physical body contain wisdom far beyond the capacity of your mind.

3. What do you love to talk about, learn about and/or teach others about?

You may not need a total overhaul in what you’re doing. Maybe you simply need to inject more of what you LOVE into your life right now. 

4. Quit talking and start doing.

Now that you’ve gotten this far, the next step is to begin taking consistent passion-based action each day.

Building your life around what you love is something you’ll never regret.

It’s your passion for what you do that will give you the drive, commitment and energy necessary to create any amount of success and fulfillment you desire, and you’ll have an extraordinary time while you do it.

That’s everything you need to know about finding your passion and probably a little more because I just can’t help myself, I’m passionate about sharing this work with you. Now go ahead and get started and don’t forget to let me know how it goes!

Happiness is an Inside Job

Many people wait for something to happen or someone to make them happy. If you expect others to make you happy, you will always be disappointed. Being responsible means not blaming others for your unhappiness. It means figuring out ways to be happy despite others’ (negative) behaviours and despite the external influences.

The all-important truth about happiness is this: your happiness depends much more on your attitude than it does on objectives, or external circumstances.

In many cases of unhappiness, people experience difficult circumstances that create paradigm shifts, whole new frames of reference by which they see the world and themselves and others in it, and what life is asking of them.

When you are caught in the stress of life, you can easily forget your responsibility and how you should react to stay happy, comfortable and calm.

You will stop to notice what is awesome and magical in life.

No one can make you happy, nor can you make anyone else happy.

Instead of looking to get happy from a person or a job, or an external factor, view relationships and/or work as outlets for happiness, and focus on how you can give more happiness.

The one thing you can’t take away from me is the way I choose to respond to what you do to me. The last of one’s freedoms is to choose one’s attitude in any given circumstance

Viktor Frankl

When you leave your happiness in someone else’s hands, you’ll end up being dependent on them and when they leave you, you’ll become empty inside.

Everything outside yourself can help you get better in life, but they are not the means to your happiness.

Happiness is acceptance

“The happiest people in the world are those who feel absolutely terrific about themselves, and this is the natural outgrowth of accepting total responsibility for every part of their life.” — Brian Tracy

Accept you for who you are. Accept that there are things that are beyond your control. Accept the things you cannot change.

Stop comparing yourself to others all the time.

Happiness is being grateful

“Happiness depends upon ourselves.” — Aristotle

What is the one unique thing you are grateful for today?

Reflect upon your present blessings, of which every man has many, not your past misfortunes, of which all men have some.

Charles Dickens

Happiness isn’t a destination, it’s a habit

“Very little is needed to make a happy life; it is all within yourself, in your way of thinking.” — Marcus Aurelius

It’s what we do to make everything else in life awesome.

And once we make that internal shift, we can put our day-to-day external frustrations into perspective.

How to Prevent Arrogance from Knocking You Out

Arrogance is a trait that we both reward and punish. We admire successful people because they always win no matter what. Even if they bash their competitors in the process. When the arrogant wins — no one seems to cares about what they leave behind in the dust.

”Be successful” has become our motto. You must prove that you are superior to everyone else in every moment. That’s why arrogance is rewarded — it comes with the job of winning. However, what you leave behind is not just the people you defeated — you sacrifice your integrity. We all pay a high price for our arrogance.

Our society confuses self-confidence with being arrogant — the concepts are related but are not the same. Confidence inspires others and will help you get the job done; arrogance turns everyone off. At work, confidence can get you hired; arrogance can get you fired.

Arrogance feeds ignorance. You become over-confident or ignore what you don’t know. Your blind spots make you easy prey. The punch that you don’t see coming is the one that knocks you out.

Ancient Greek literature uses the term “hubris,” in which people think of themselves to be of a higher status than ordinary mortals. That’s the problem with arrogant people: they expect others to treat them like a god — they want to be revered.

Arrogance is a form of manipulation — one exploits others’ perceptions of oneself to avoid self-esteem from being hurt.

The essential nature of arrogance is inherently negative. However, it has a positive aspect too. Vanity is the negative outcome and pride is the positive one.

Pride is about recognizing your own good qualities. It means you neither exaggerate your abilities nor mask your vulnerabilities.

Vanity is an excessive pride. It’s the need to continually compare to others in a way that you always look superior. You excel at uncovering other people’s flaws, but not yours.

Arrogance is knowledge minus wisdom.

Celso Cukierkorn

How to Overcome Arrogance

Lack of self-compassion drives arrogance. We tend to take ourselves too seriously, that’s why we want to look better in the eyes of others. The best antidote to overcome arrogance is to treat ourselves more kindly.

Laugh at yourself. When you can poke fun at your flaws, you let go of the need to look perfect in front of other people. You don’t need to downplay yourself either. False modesty doesn’t help. Acknowledge your weak links. Feel proud of being a “work in progress.”

Admit your errors. Owning your actions makes you free. Even if that means becoming accountable for your mistakes. When you stop blaming others, you stop pretending you are better than everyone else.

Spend time with yourself. Meditate, go for a walk, write your accomplishments in a journal, or simply take some time to appreciate your own company. When you feel good being alone, the desire to be appreciated by others diminishes. Look for your own acceptance rather than others.

Be kind to yourself. If you are over-critical about your achievements, you will never feel satisfied. Take it easy. Learn to treat yourself with respect. Avoid comparing yourself to others. Be your own benchmark. Acknowledge your progress. Don’t feel you’re a failure when you fail, increase your mistake tolerance and learn from your errors.

When you stop taking yourself too seriously, you don’t need to use arrogance as a crutch anymore.

Stay alert on how you deal with self-pride. Don’t become a victim of a punch you didn’t see coming. Avoid arrogance from knocking you out.

Stay human.

How to make everyone feel included

Whether it be in a conversation, at the office, or at school, it is important to work towards emotionally including everybody. 

While this can seem daunting and challenging, it is completely worth it. A recent study found that “almost half of our population feel alone, and younger generations feel the most isolated.” If you want to make an immediate and important change in your community, inclusion is one of the most effective ways to do so.

We’re genetically wired to belong; it’s how we survive and thrive in life — and at work. This is especially important for minorities who often don’t feel included at the office. New research shows that fostering a sense of belonging helps reduce stress levels, and consequently improves physical health, emotional well-being, and performance.

Whether it’s a new team member or someone who seems out of the loop, here are four ways to make people feel included:

  • Make introductions. Don’t introduce people just by their title. Add tidbits that are unique to the individual and show that you appreciate them. Use language like: “This is Sara — she is part of our research team.” The word “our” really adds the feeling of being on a team.
  • Solicit input. Don’t expect everyone to show up and speak up. Invite people who you want to include, ask their opinion, and follow up with questions so they truly felt heard. 
  • Share stories. Stories show that you, as the storyteller, care enough about your audience’s career to show your own vulnerability and share your mistakes and successes. They also help people connect emotionally. 
  • Offer a sincere greeting. Making eye contact, saying “Hello” and making conversation goes a long way. The most important part, however, is that you listen and show a genuine interest.
  • Request their help solving a problem. Every person you work with has a skill or knowledge you don’t. Acknowledge that by reaching out to them for help.
  • Recognize their contributions. Tell them specifically what they do well, and how it contributes both to the team and the organization.

No one has built a solid foundation with a team of people who feel invisible. Ensuring that your team don’t feel overlooked, ignored or left out can propel not only your team’s internal success, but its external success, too.

What are you watering?

Your  mind is like a piece of land planted with many different kinds of seeds: seeds of joy, peace, mindfulness, understanding, and love; seeds of craving, anger, fear, hate, and forgetfulness. These wholesome and unwholesome seeds are always there, sleeping in the soil of your mind. The quality of your life depends on the seeds you water.

If you plant tomato seeds in your gardens, tomatoes will grow. Just so, if you water a seed of peace in your mind, peace will grow. When the seeds of happiness in you are watered, you will become happy. When the seed of anger in you is watered, you will become angry. The seeds that are watered frequently are those that will grow strong.

Thinking about your thoughts might seem like a double bind. We have thoughts… all day long, up to 70,000 of them. How much time do you spend thinking about your thoughts? Do you just let them happen to you or are you deliberate in what you think?

The happiness of your life depends upon the quality of your thoughts: therefore, guard accordingly, and take care that you entertain no notions unsuitable to virtue and reasonable nature.

Marcus Aurelias

When we inquire as to what people want, eventually the answer is ‘to be happy’. Therefore, if we believe that our happiness of our life does depend on the quality of our thoughts… then we do need as the Emperor says: ‘To guard accordingly’.  Let’s state that in the positive though. Instead of a defensive guarding, let’s get on the front foot and take an active role in observing and then choosing our thoughts.

Our thoughts are worth examining for clues and patterns but not endlessly.  Removing interference in our thought patterns brings clarity and focus. Our thoughts aren’t wrong per se they are just thoughts. It’s the meaning that we attach to them that then drives our responses and our actions. When your response and action is not what you want e.g. you feel unhappy or your response is frustration or anger it’s helpful to observe your thoughts. Thoughts come and go. The more aware we are of them the better. We just don’t need to act on every one of them.

When you review the key areas of your life such as work, relationships, health, wealth, and appearance what are your thoughts about each. Are your thoughts of a high quality or could they do with an upgrade? How would you rate the quality of your thoughts? What would you like them to be? Can you just let the thoughts that you don’t need, just float away?

Such a simple declaration about the relationship between our happiness and thoughts has us thinking deeply. We can observe the thoughts that we are having and then choose again if we need to. Making a commitment to choose thoughts that are of a good quality is essential if you want to be happy. Be discerning about the quality of thoughts you let run through your precious mind every day.  No-one else is responsible for our happiness. Only ourselves and our thoughts.

The key to happiness is to think about all that you must be grateful for in your life. So, lastly, I want to convey that “Have a positive thought in your mind and create a blessed and happy life for yourself”.

What’s going on with your thinking? Let me know in the comments box below. I would love to hear from you.

The Secret to Really Believing in Yourself

Believing in yourself means having faith in your own capabilities. It means believing that you CAN do something — that it is within your ability. When you believe in yourself, you can overcome self-doubt and have the confidence to take action and get things done.

When you’re drowning in fears, doubts, and self-sabotaging behaviors, success feels out of your grasp. All of the skills, training, and tools in the world won’t change your life.

The mindset that psychologists call “self-efficacy” is something you can build with practice. Self-efficacy is related to the idea of confidence, but it’s not just being cocky for no reason. It’s also related to determination and, a bit more distantly, to discipline and motivation.

When you have high self-efficacy, you believe that you can do the thing. Whatever that thing may be. Maybe you’re just getting started on a long journey, but you know you’ll make it to the end. You see the obstacles in your path as speed bumps, not barriers. If you run into a problem, you’ll find a way to solve it. You just know you will.

These beliefs aren’t something you’re born with or something you get from luck or miracles. You build them over time, with practice and experience.

Here are some of the ways that psychologists say we can build self-efficacy: 

Congratulate yourself for small wins

Past successes are fuel for future success. This applies to tiny things like habits: if you managed to make it to the gym once, it’s a lot easier to show up on day two. 

It also applies to bigger projects. If you did a beginner running program and “graduated” by running a five-kilometer race, that’s huge. You learned that you can follow a program. You learned that you can run farther than you ever thought you could. You learned what it feels like to go out for a run when you’re tired, but finish anyway. You learned what that finish-line glow of accomplishment really feels like. And you can harness all of that, all over again, when you start working on a new goal. 

Another thing I like to do, especially when I haven’t seen success in something lately, is to look for things I can be proud of in the process. I didn’t lift the 140 pound log at my last strongman meet, but I hit 127 pounds in training, which is a hell of a lot more than I could do when I started.

Watch people doing the thing you want to do

The second-best thing to reflecting your own past experiences is to vicariously experience others’ success. You’ll want to choose your role models carefully; pay attention to who really inspires you. 

For some people, looking up to a world-class athlete can inspire them in the gym. For others, it can be helpful to look at somebody who is closer to you in skill level or experience. When your friend hits a new personal record, you’ll cheer for them, right? Even though you weren’t the person actually performing, you’ve still experienced a taste the whole rollercoaster of emotions from being nervous at the attempt to celebrating the success.

Seek out people who encourage you

Believing in yourself doesn’t have to be a solo project. Just as you can cheer on a gym buddy, your buddy can cheer you on as well. Also, make an effort to seek out instructors, coaches, and mentors who make you feel unstoppable. If somebody you trust thinks that you can do something, you’ll start to believe it too.

Visualize success (and failure)

When you’re trying to stay on a path, it helps to know where that path leads. What will it look like to make it to your goal? How will you feel when you cross that finish line, when you lift that goal weight, when you’ve been eating vegetables with your meals for a whole year? 

While you’re at it—if you’re ready for this—also imagine scenarios where you’re trying to do the thing and you momentarily can’t. How will you feel if you get injured, if a vacation knocks you off track, or if your gym buddy stops being able to come with you? Your plan is big enough to survive these obstacles, but it will help to think them through ahead of time and plan out how you will handle them. Then, when the time comes, you won’t hesitate to execute your plan.

The power of believing you can improve

The magic happens by simply believing it’s possible. Your belief in possibility is necessary to the work, the experimentation, and the consistency needed to change your life.

This belief in possibility is what provided rock stars with the single-minded intensity to get on stage every night, in the face of ridiculous odds. 

It’s what gave famous authors the tenacity to keep writing and editing after countless rejected manuscripts. 

It’s what kept star athletes training, through pain, injury, and loss, until they made it to the top.

Now you have some tools to start believing in yourself. Work on these steps consistently, and you will begin to see amazing things happening in your life.

Why “Doing Your Best” is a Better Bet than “Being The Best”

No matter what you’re trying to accomplish, with thousands of other people trying to do the same thing, it surely helps to be driven.  After all, most of the greatest entrepreneurs, politicians, scientists, and artists were perpetually striving to beat their personal best or challenge the status quo.  Yet being driven to succeed should not be confused with the kind of competitive ambition that can consume you.  So, do you need to be competitive with others, and what is the essential difference between “being the best” and “doing your best”?

Let’s start by finding out where you are on the spectrum of ambition. Are you someone with a driving need to:

A.

  • Win arguments
  • Exceed other people’s standards and expectations
  • Out-perform others
  • Innovate for the sake of being ahead
  • Be the best

B.

  • Beat your own personal bests
  • Push yourself to master new skills
  • Do the very best at what you do
  • Rely on your own drive to be better

If you answered mostly A, you’re more competitive with others, put yourself first and are therefore less suited to collaboration. You’re in the zone of being the best. Because you’re often distracted by who’s in front and who’s behind and because let’s face it, it’s hard to know whether you ever really are “the best,” it’s likely you feel disappointed and stressed out.

Whenever my competitiveness surfaces, I feel tense and anxious in the pit of my stomach. My heart beat accelerates and my breathing becomes faster and shallower.

If you answered mostly B, your ambition is of the kind favored by corporations. You may be driven, but you’re still able to collaborate usefuly. You’re more about doing your best. Because, instead of competing with other people you are setting your own benchmarks for success, it’s likely that you feel more relaxed and in control.

When I’m simply doing my best, I feel excited rather than anxious.   There is no tension in my body and I feel present and at ease. My heartbeat and breathing are normal, because I’m not in a race.

Here are six questions to help you with the distinction of doing your best:

Do you Accept Your Own Ambition?

You may judge all ambition in yourself and others as being ugly. However, if you find yourself feeling irritated or even jealous when other people display signs of being driven, this could be a signal that you haven’t yet accepted your own ambitious streak.

Are you choosing what you want to be driven towards?

It’s tiring to have ambitions in every arena. Pick what you care about most and focus on that.

Do you compete with others all the time or only when it serves you?

Comparing yourself with others can support you to distinguish your skills and the unique value you can add. But, your biggest competitor should always be yourself.

Have you got enough ambitious people around you?

Befriending and learning from role models and mentors who are smarter and more successful than you will  help expand your sense of possibility.  Even if you aren’t competing with them, their energy will rub off on you. Talk with and learn from people different from you. Be open to dialogue with acquaintances and even select strangers, as you may uncover interesting opportunities.”

Are you willing to take risks?

Ambition takes a willingness to step into fear and anxiety. Some people are better able to tolerate this fear, perhaps because they are more courageous, committed, or driven, and can minimize the fear. Ambitious people act with purpose, but allow themselves room to explore, experiment and discover.

Whenever you’re next in doubt about whether you’re being competitive or ambitious, ask yourself this: “Am I really trying to do my best or is this about my need to be the best?” Chances are, you’ll be able to tell which state you’re in just by how you feel in your body.

Making a Difference in Someone’s Life

It’s a weekday night, you get home from work, quickly make yourself some dinner or maybe order something from one of the many apps on your phone. After dinner you plop down on the couch and turn on your TV and say glued to Netflix or Prime until it’s time to head to bed. Does that sound familiar? 

Maybe that’s even what you did last night? Don’t worry this is a judgement free zone. Do you ever find yourself wondering and yet so powerfully certain at the same time that, “There’s got to be something more than this.” I for one know from firsthand experience that there is more to life than this.

I was always the guy who was looking for a way to change a life and give back ever since I was little. I’ve always opted for volunteering with different organizations as my way to make a difference, but there are so many unique ways that you can positively impact those around you. And you know what? Not only does helping someone else out make a difference in someone else’s life, but it also makes a difference in your own life.

Taking the time to think about others, volunteering our time, helping someone with their groceries or however else we might do it, has an immense impact on our overall happiness and fulfillment in our own lives. You are not alone with this feeling to make a difference. In fact, so many people have a desire to make a difference that Match.com even decided to add it as one of the only 20 “Bucket List” options you can choose from that they have singles fill out when they first complete their dating profile.

We all have a desire to be seen, to be valued, and to be heard, truly heard. In most cases when we spend time helping others or volunteering with an organization we not only feel good on the inside, but we feel valued by the organization or by the person we are helping. We feel like we matter. We ALL have a desire to feel like we matter in this 7.5 billion people packed world and making a difference, makes us feel like we matter. It makes us feel validated. It makes us feel like we are important.

No matter where we are in our life, no matter what type of schedule we currently have, there is always a way to make a difference in somebody’s life.

Here is my three step process that I am so excited to share with you about how you can intentionally start to make a positive difference in someone’s life today.

Three steps to making a difference:

  1. Define what making a difference means to you. This is the first step because you want to be intentional in your approach. There’s no use volunteering where your best friend does if it doesn’t light you up inside. It’s so easy for us to compare ourselves to others even when it comes to doing good in the world and giving back, but try your best not to play the comparison game. Define what making a difference means to you in the current season of life you are in and don’t mind what your neighbor or friend has going on.
  1. How can you uniquely contribute? What are the strengths you have? Maybe it’s a personality trait that makes you naturally really great at taking care of dogs, playing with kids, or playing card games with the elderly. Evaluate what you know to be true about yourself and what you enjoy doing. Think about what you feel like you have been called to do in this world. Is there a specific role that you want to play in giving back and making a difference?
  1. Do what you want to do. Do you like helping out in groups or do you prefer to volunteer alone? Is there a passion project that you’ve been dying to start that would have positive impact on many lives? Is there a specific cause that you want to try to figure out how to get involved with? Think about what you want to do and why it means something to you. Many times the things that have meaning to us go so much deeper than that we want to make a difference. Try filling out the following sentence in helping you decide what your deeper meaning is.

“I want to do___________________ because of _____________________ and by doing this it will make me feel__________________________.”

I have shared the following poem before, but it is so apt here:

One song can spark a moment,
One flower can wake the dream
One tree can start a forest,
One bird can herald spring.

One smile begins a friendship,
One handclasp lifts a soul.
One star can guide a ship at sea,
One word can frame the goal

One vote can change a nation,
One sunbeam lights a room
One candle wipes out darkness,
One laugh will conquer gloom.

One step must start each journey.
One word must start each prayer.
One hope will raise our spirits,
One touch can show you care.

One voice can speak with wisdom,
One heart can know what’s true,
One life can make a difference,
You see, it’s up to you!

Your Walk vs Your Talk

There is an old saying that is usually shared with all sporting teams that encourages them to lift when they are losing momentum during a game.

When a brave person takes a stand, it stiffens the spines of others.

Billy Graham

To me, this paints a vivid mental picture and is what a leader does in times of adversity and the team has their backs to the wall. One courageous person, does what it takes and stands up against the odds and leads by example. Then a decisive psychological affect starts to compound and becomes contagious to all other players, winning back the momentum and more times than not, winning the game. That shift though, started with one person, a natural leader who sacrificed their own well being and safety for the sake of the team.

Leadership is a skill and like any other, it can be learned, and that means it requires practice.

You don’t just get a promotion to supervisor or manager and all of a sudden you become a leader. As convincing as that two day off site course on leadership was, it doesn’t qualify you as a leader.

The reality is, it takes work. Leadership is not a rank, position or title. If you are a good leader, you work harder and longer than everyone else, you LEAD BY EXAMPLE. The more you do this and practice it, the better you get, but it all comes at a cost, which is your time, experience and stepping up when no one else will. The other hard part about leadership is it is difficult to measure. There is no real metric that measures leadership. It’s an accumulation of lots of little things that anyone of them by themselves is innocuous and useless. Literally pointless by themselves. It is the small things, the one percenters and putting others interests before your own that makes a great leader.

One of my favorite leadership fables is that of Mahatma Gandhi. This story defines the true meaning of leading by example and not following advice, but more so action.

In the 1930’s there was a young boy who had become addicted to and obsessed with eating sugar. His mother decided to get help and took the long and hot journey with her son walking many miles and hours under the scorching sun. 

She finally reached Gandhi and asked him to tell her son to stop eating sugar, it wasn’t good for his health. Gandhi replied, “I cannot tell him that. But you may bring him back in a few weeks and then I will talk to him.” The mother was confused and upset and took the boy home.

Two weeks later she came back. This time Gandhi looked directly at the boy and said “”Boy, you should stop eating sugar. It is not good for your health.” The boy nodded his head and promised he wouldn’t. The boy’s mother was puzzled. She asked “Why didn’t you tell him that two weeks ago when I brought him here to see you?”

Gandhi smiled and said, “Two weeks ago I was eating a lot of sugar myself!”

What Lesson Are You Teaching?

You may not know it, but your day-to-day behavior, from the way you drive to the tone of your voice, is shaping the way those around you will act.

For many children and those starting their careers, the most important role models are those who have a regular presence in their lives. They are like a sponge, absorbing everything you say and do.

They learn attitudes, behaviors, prejudices, likes, dislikes, compassion and generosity by watching the way you conduct yourself each day.

How you respond to problems, handle stress, frustrations, treat other people, and deal with responsibilities, loss, and mistakes will impact the lives behind their eyes watching you.

Children especially look up to a variety of role models that help shape how they behave in school, handle relationships, or make difficult decisions. Children will use the example you set, whether it be positive or negative, as a pattern for the way life should be lived.

What we do doesn’t define who we are; who we are defines what we do.

Saying “Do as I say, not as I do” simply does not work.

Let no man imagine that he has no influence

Henry George

Remember the importance of being a positive role model because there is always someone looking up to you.